Patong After Dark

patong after dark

I’ve heard so much about Bangla road so I knew that I had to see this place for myself. I don’t know about you but if you manage to get me to go anywhere on Sunday night, i’ll only consider it because I know it will be pretty chilled… Not in Patong! I had never seen such in my life. I promised my friends on Facebook that I wouldn’t say much about Bangla and that’s purely because I was dumbstruck at what goes down there. To put it lightly, its debaucherous (chesa model c)! After spending the afternoon learning about Thai religious practices – I can confirm that there is no way in the world Buddha came around this way ever… in any form.

Instead I decided to pop into a small bar near our hotel which was pretty quiet – thank goodness after what I had just seen. This turned out to be the best decision ever because I made a new friend who likes goofing out with me! He’s from Singapore (who knew there were white people who originate from Singapore?) the night continued and we tippexed our names in time… on a bar table. Yes that dramatically done. Thank you tequila.

Tipexed in Thailand

Fast forward to two nights later when the shock had worn off – I tackled Bangla road again. I felt more prepared for what I had to see. Remember I told you I went to Thailand with a blank canvas? Hai bad …and I mean BAD idea. Looking back, I wish I had done a bit of Googling on Bangla road entertainment beforehand. Having basic knowledge of a lady-boy or a Ping Pong Show would’ve probably saved me the embarrassment of asking “why does your Ping Pong Show leaflet have naked women on it?”… Ping Pong has a totally different meaning in Patong.

Bangla road
Drag queens on Bangla road

Moving along, I saw these fabulous drag queens (brings back happy beefcakes memories with my girls) – they charge something like 50 baht (Aprox. R20) to take photos so this is all I could snap whilst they weren’t looking.

It would’ve been immoral for me to pay them for this photo hey ? 

There are so many people on the road trying to get you to look at something, to buy something or to stop for something, that’s the best way I can explain the Bangla road scene. It like downtown Jozi – more towards the Noord side but with a sea, and instead of Pakistani people – it has Thai people.  This place makes those Lollipop lounge billboards in Joburg look like child’s play. I mean who swings down poles in full view of the public in next to nothing *gasp* not one or two ladies – try next to 20 ladies I mean. I’m judging… my bad. Let me go back to purely explaining so you can make up your own mind.

On the bright side the drinks are  reasonably priced. An island where they actually specialize in cocktails hallelujah! Not that rum and raspberry combo – real cocktails. I’m cheesy enough to have a Mai Tai so I can write I had a Mai Tai in Thailand! Mai Tai’s aren’t from Thailand by the way:/ what a waste of my cheesiness). Then I had everything else because its mostly buy one get one free or an open bar if you hit one of the big clubs. You know there is a more than an efficient taxi system to get you back to your hotel safely – if you don’t believe me why haven’t you read my “Even me – I want to be a scooter girl post.”

cocktails and khalua
Yes please!

Seduction night club! Now we talking fun and civilisation in one place (well as civilised as clubs go I mean). Its 3 floors of mostly tourists from all around the globe, local and international DJs, amazing music and free alcohol. Well sort of free alcohol. They have a different way of doing things at Patong clubs – your entrance fee includes about 3 hours worth of an open bar. Seems expensive on the onset to pay 800 baht for a club, but I think its fair when you count in the open bar and global company (i.e people that can actually understand what you saying).

Africans in Thailand
Me and sisi at Seduction, Patong Thailand

How many people can say they danced to french music with a sexy Italian guy from Australia (he’s probably reading this so if you ask nicely I’ll ask him to comment below), shared a drink with South American ladies who also know a dude from Guinea-Bissau, topped off with the best tequila sunrise at sunrise in Phuket Thailand?!

Hahahah not me – South American’s have no clue where Guinea-Bissau is but the rest is spot on. That is how exciting Thailand night life gets!

Too much to do and not enough time but I heard these places also guarantee you a great night in Phuket. I will definitely pop in next time:

  • Koh Phangan full moon party 
  • Phi Phi Island beach party
  • Monsoon bar bangla road
  • Tiger bars (I went in here on the Sunday, freaked me out but try it out for yourself) 
  • Illuzion night club (across the road from Seduction)

That’s enough of the mayhem and foolishness for a day darlings!

Have a super weekend!

Share this storyShare on FacebookTweet about this on Twitter



Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *